Knowing the truth

I was talking to a small group this evening. We have 3 new interns from the Union Biblical Seminary who started their 7 months practical ministry training with us at Jeevan Sahara Kendra today. We were joined by 2 church members from a local congregation. The topic was an overview of HIV - in order to get them up to speed for the next session of our church training which we are holding on Saturday.

One of the many areas we covered was the issue of HIV testing. At its core is the hard kernel of knowing the truth. Knowing what my HIV status is. Knowing whether I have been infected by the virus or not.

In his public confession after committing adultery, king David says: 'surely you desire truth in the inner parts' (Psalm 51.6). For us to change we have to confront the past - in the present. For many of us this will take the concrete form of an HIV antibody test. For others it will be something else - some tangible sign of things we may not want to address.

For a person at risk of HIV - knowing the reality is the first step to moving forward. But it may be a bitter pill to swallow in the here and now. We are natural procrastinators - natural head-hiding-ostriches who want to push the inevitable off a little more, who seek a little more sleep before having to face the dawn.

Sadly, so many are not with us anymore - because they refused to face reality. Their denial - ultimately self-imposed (though many times tangled up in the fear and shame that still surrounds HIV) - kept them from implementing the many things that have helped HIV positive persons around the world live on to fight for another day - for another year - for the rest of their ever-expanding average life-span.

Whether we have HIV or not, we face this issue at so many levels. Do we have the courage to really know the truth? Are we scared of what we might find?

The good news is that we don't have to face our truth alone. The One who lovingly made us is by our side - ready to listen to us if we ask Him for help. He is not afraid of what might be hidden - since all truth comes from Him - who is the Truth. And not only that - His truth is linked with love and acceptance - and a desire to help us move forward.