Saturday 21 August 2010

People are not for dumping

Two days ago we got a comment on the JSK website. It was a request for help. A lady asked us for guidance about her auntie - who lives in Kalyan and whose husband died of HIV some years ago. I replied with telling her to bring her and we will talk. The lady called up a number of times afterwards to get directions.

Yesterday they came. They were a group of 7 people. The woman with HIV was with them. She has herpes zoster and has lost her vision in one eye. She was quite sick and needs admission.

"She is last stage" said the people who brought her.

We will dignify this lady with a name - we will call her "Malini."

"Who is her relative?" asked Sheba of the 6 people who brought her (including one man who was drunk). "None of us are" - "We are all just neighbours who are concerned for her" - "Please do something for her - she is very poor" - "We don't know where her relatives are"

Malini sat in the midst of these lies.

We know that at least the lady who called up before was Malini's neice. But when it comes down to really helping none of them wanted to come forward.

Sheba explained that this was not a "last stage" - that so much could be done with treatment. While HIV is serious and there is no "guarantee" that everything will 'turn out all right' - we need to have someone there who can help make decisions for Malini.

This group of 6 were total strangers to us from far away. Sheba asked them to talk about it and decide while she saw another patient who had come for admission with a high fever. She clearly told them that one of them would have to be here with Malini. She offered a referral to Sion hospital as an alternative. She clearly said that we would be happy to look after Malini, but that Malini could not be here alone.

People are not for 'dumping.' In our society, there is a belief that certain places will look after people for ever. We are of course in awe of the "mother Theresa's" of this world - who look after the desititute without any questions. But this is a case where Malini does have relatives. They were with her. She was too scared to speak up and identify them. They rejected her in front of us, hoping that it would cause us to take her on.

We said no.

Heartbreaking. No easy answer to this.

But we do not have the capacity to be an ashram for people who are abandonned by their own relatives. If Malini were from this area and we had some contacts who could help us understand who she actually is, we would have taken her on. But she was from far away. Taking on a person is not like installing a bookshelf.

They left - leaving Malini behind.

After a while the phone calls came again. Please keep her. We will send the man (who was drunk). We told them to come back. In the mean-time more patients came.

Malini was sitting quietly in the front room.

Then she dissappeared.

Did they come back?

Did she walk out?

We don't know.

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For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; he will lead them to springs of living water.

And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes. Rev. 7.17


Oh, hasten the day.

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