Happy Days

A month can seem an eternity.  A month can be the blink of an eye.

Enoch is already a month past his 11th birthday.   His cake made it onto the blog - but the rest of our celebration with him did not.  As did many other things.

Suffice it to say - there is much of our lives that does not show up here - but then that's how it should be isn't it?  It would be pretty creepy if every single part of our lives were documented and sliced and diced and served up for public consumption.

So if we rewind (remember doing that with cassette tapes?  esp. using a pen?)

Enoch, shares his Feb 19th birthday with none other than the great Maratha king Shivaji himself.    This means that our mornings are a little less hectic as the kids don't have to be at school at their usual 6.50 AM.

After getting the household together we had a time of prayer with Enoch - with Appa praying for his first grandson who had been born 11 years ago on that day.  It was especially appropriate as Amma and Appa had come to be with us at that time.

Then it was time for gifts.  In good Eicher tradition - we had hidden them around the room.  And so Asha and Enoch went on a treasure hunt.  And found a number of goodies for Enoch (with the odd one for Asha too).

On some years the kids get something 'big.'

This was one such year for Enoch.

After everything had been opened, we told him that there was something else which was 'hiding in plain sight.'

We had slipped a new key onto our key holder - and asked Enoch if he could identify the new key.  He did and we had him open the front door - and bring in what was 'parked' outside, waiting to be seen:



Later in the day, Enoch's friends came over for a birthday party.

We had a football theme going - starting out with a game of 'straw blowing' football in a small lego football pitch that Enoch had made.

And then of course there was the cake.



Now past experience has told us that some kids come who are strict vegetarians - so this year we had an alternative for them too - we decorated some eggless muffins for them as an ersatz cake.

 We are so happy for Enoch to have friends - and pray that this year he will be an even better friend to them in every way.

Drumil - whose sister is in Asha's year - had to go early.   I was wondering why he showed up so very punctually at even before the party's 'starting time.  Like so many others, Drumil has tuition classes to attend - and a reminder call came to our place to get him out the door.

And then there were Enoch's friends Nikita and Jasper - who weren't able to come on the big day...

... so they helped Enoch extend his birthday to the weekend when the showed up - parents in tow - and decked Enoch in a Barca kit - and made him a lego football card to boot (punintended)!

What a kick to see a card like this!

Enoch looks a bit like he is being drafted himself into the dream team.

How lovely to have an extended family to be with us on these happy days - both through direct parentage - as well as those like John and Nalini Gabriel (Nikita and Jasper's parents) who have been such a joy over the years!

With so much fun you would imagine that we would put off the birthday thing for another year and declare a moratorium on B-day festivities for at least a few months to allow us to catch our breath again given Asha being a Jan-baby and Enoch showing up in February.

But the happy days continued!

As a family we were so blessed to have Appa and Amma with us for a month.

Appa and Amma had been with Sheba's older sister Daisy and Ramesh and their kids Frankie and Shofar for half a year.  They flew in to Chennai and spent another 3 weeks with Peter and Yashmeet and Anmol before coming here on February 6th.  They were thus able to celebrate Enoch's birthday with us....

... and we were able to celebrate Appa's 76th birthday with them on March the 2nd!

No, we did not light 76 candles for Appa - we had them in a '7' and a '6' on top of his cake.

Before we were married - when we were just starting the process of praying about what God wanted of us - Appa suffered a terrible heart-attack.

Sheba said that it was the kind that usually had a 5 year life-expectancy after suffering such an attack.

Appa is very good with his medicines - and we pray daily for him as well.  And it has now been 15 years since that attack.

How grateful we are to the Lord for His gift of such a good father to Sheba.

Each additional year added to our lives is an absolute gift.

We really do not know where the next steps of any of us are - but are glad when we look back and see God's wonderful faithfulness in so many ways.

For Appa - God has protected him and guided him even before Appa acknowledged who God was.  In his youth Appa had been part of a 'rationalistic' political party among other things - and all along God continued to draw him nearer and nearer to him.

It was very appropriate that Appa's birthday was on a Sunday - the Lord's day.  After our family celebration - we continued to celebrate with our family of faith.  Being the first Sunday of the month, both our house-fellowships met at Rolly's home for worship, breaking bread, teaching and sharing, and then we had a meal together.  Asha is able to play by ear and so even our small fellowship's singing (which is not always the most harmonious) is sweetend by that heavenly instrument.

 Later in the evening, Appa was able to share at the Gospel meeting we hold at the centre every Sunday evening.  It was good that on his physical birthday Appa was also able to share the story of his spiritual birthday in Rourkela, Odisha more than 40 years ago!

As we wind down March 2014 - we just have to say how glad we have been for these happy days.  They days of celebration because of God's great love and kindness to us individually and to us as a family.

May we (and you too gentle reader!) experience many more happy days in the days to come!

Underground

We have some pretty exciting things that may bear fruit in the next few weeks at Jeevan Sahara Kendra.

My lips are sealed - at this point at least.  Do stay tuned!

But whatever the developments may be - one thing is sure:  HIV as we know it has not gone away. 

Though it has dropped off the funding priorities of most international agencies, and though the press has a 'ho-hum' approach to the whole matter - we are still seeing lives that have been devastated by the disease in various ways.

Let me count some of them:

1.  A man who has worked in the gulf - amassing a small fortune for his family - is now alone in a room in his appartment.  He has HIV and has hardly any CD4 cells left (his last count was only 8 per cubic cm - a healthy person has between 900-1200 or so).  But more than the sickness - he is starved for love as his wife and three daughters want very little to do with him.  And so he is alone in his room.

2.  Another man is under psychiatric care in a large hospital.  He had not been doing well on his medication and went to a 'prophetess' - a young girl who told him to throw away his medicines and believe that God would heal him.   Needless to say, the hoped-for-healing remained just that.   When he started back on his meds, his mind started to unhinge.   His wife is now with him in the hospital - trying to stabilize him.

3.  A woman recently found out that she was HIV positive when she started falling sick.  Her husband had died many years ago - but she did not think she had it.  Now she knows she does.

4.  A man called up asking for help as his mother needs further hospitalisation.  She is at a place where most of their money has been spent on the treatment and she is not getting better.

5.  A young man was just about to go to the gulf.  The routine medical check-up found out something that neither he nor his family expected.  He is HIV positive.  They are floored and wondering what to do for his future - and what to do with their shattered dreams.

6.  A man called me up today worried because he may have HIV.  He told me that he had a sexual contact a month ago and had been using two condoms and wanted to know whether he may have the disease.   It was surreal for me to be talking to him - not knowing where he was calling from.   Last month I talked to a man who was on a ship off the coast of Nigeria.

7.  Our team did two testing camps along with organisations who reach out to women in prostitution (yes I am using the old-fashioned word).   Sadly of 8 the 29 women tested were HIV positive.  This is 28% - much higher than the 6% figure that the government has for women who sell sex in India.

8.  A young teenage girl found out last year that she was also HIV positive.  Her alcoholic father has not been taking his medicines regularly - preferring to self-medicate with his bottle.  The girl has manifested a variety of abnormal behaviour - though the last few weeks have seen her come back to some kind of normalcy.

9.  A veteran HIV activist came to the clinic today - she is on 'second-line' therapy from the government - but the main Government site in Mumbai where these medicines are given to people with HIV who are not responding to the basic meds anymore have been in severe medication shortages over the last 3 months.  So the 'answer' is to give patients only 4-10 days of medications - and then have them come back again.  It is hard enough to go all the way there once a month - now they have to do so multiple times - taking leave - missing work and family responsibilities.  But most cannot buy the medications on their own because of the high cost.

10.  A little boy comes everyday with his mother to our JSK clinic.  He is 11 years old - but looks like he is 6.  He comes because he has multi-drug TB along with his HIV.  We are giving him medications every day for his 2 year course of MDRTB meds, which our friends from Mediecines Sans Frontieres have alloted for this boy.  His father is unstable, so it is the mother who bravely brings this little boy every day for his treatment.

And so the stories go on. 

Every person precious. 

Often in situations that defy a simple solution.

Where are all the people that I have mentioned above?

Well, they are all around us.    But hidden - because of the stigma that is still spiralled around the disease. 

And because of something else - I think that in India we have now moved from the scare-mongering days of the early 1990s (HIV is everywhere - we will soon overtake Africa etc) to a point today where we have slipped into some kind of underground of apathy tinged with the same-old-same-old fear and loathing of the disease.   "Another topic please?  This one is too morbid for me"

There is clearly still work to be done.  We at Jeevan Sahara Kendra are part of it - and will remain part of it for the foreseeable future it seems.

So we press on.

With God's help change is possible. 

Every single person affected by this disease, every family that is going through the wringer, every seemingly impossible situation (and there are so many of them) - each one is also an opportunity for grace.  And mercy.  And change.

Building a wonder

Over the last week we have started building one of the modern wonders of the world - the one and only Taj Mahal. 

O.K. - it's the lego version of the Taj - but for us it is still a wonder.  And while it will not take (hopefully) the 21 years the original took to construct, we realise that the 5922 pieces in this amazing kit are not assembling themselves on their own.

So Enoch and his Daddy are hard at work play - with occasional inputs from the ladies of the house.

Here is Enoch putting the very first pieces together. 

A series of eight interlocking portions that form the base of this beautiful structure.

Needless to say, with so many pieces, just finding the right ones is half the fun of it.

Till now we have found almost all the pieces - with a few having to be substituted by our existing lego hoard.

Asha has lent the odd helping hand - and has one of the minarets to her credit.

Sheba is slightly bemused by the building fever that has gripped us.  We are trying to parcel it out in reasonable pieces of time (though Sunday night did see me scratching away on my own for a fair bit well after everyone else was asleep).
 

And so here is the progress as of this evening.

The base is complete, the minarets are up.

And the bottom of the main dome is being made.  A lot more to come, and many more hours of constructing this three dimensional puzzle await us....

Fire

We were driving the 'Papaya' (our orange Nano car) on a crisp clear Sunday morning to the home where we meet for worship when we saw a fire engine go by in the opposite direction.   "Must have been something" we mused.  Turning the corner just before the home we meet in, we saw another fire engine and some police vehicles.  Everything seemed quiet, so we carried on and climbed the three flights of steps to the beautiful home of Jolly and Suma where we meet each Sunday morning.

They told us that their morning anything but quiet.

The family had awoken to screams and saw smoke coming out of a near-by building.  Flames of fire could be seen and the fire engines rushed to try and help.

Sadly we understand that two elderly people were charred to death in the blaze.  There were a number of fire-engines who responded, but the fire-fighters ladders apparently only reached up to about the 10th floor.

So a couple had save themselves by standing outside on the parapet of their 12th story home - till the fire inside could be controlled.  They suffered severe burns but were rescued eventually.

Our friends told us how horrible it was to see the whole scene unfold before their eyes and feel so helpless as the people were stranded on the very edge, and the ladders were just not able to reach them.

Makes you think...

How close any of us are to disaster.

Would anyone in that upscale building ever think that the next morning a tragedy would happen in their own 'safe and secure' building?  Would anyone imagine that the best fire equipment would only reach the 10th floor?  What about the many 27 story high-rises that are mushrooming up around our city?

How brief our candle burns.

Are we ready for tomorrow?  Have we set things in order?

Are their people we need to ask forgiveness of?  Are their others who we refuse to forgive, holding onto our bitterness?

Are we right with God?  Looking forward to meeting Him?

The silhouette in the photo below could be you, or me... standing on the edge while the flames leap up blocking our way out...

Dear and gentle reader,

Please do not delay.  Listen to what the Lord has told you.  Don't put off till tomorrow what must be done today.

I include myself in this challenge.  There are many areas of my life that I would say are still undone, were a fire to sweep through and burn everything up.

Help me Lord, to live as you wish me to.

 It is not by accident that the topic I share on that Sunday morning was the marvelous work of God on the day of Pentecost - 50 days after Christ rose from the dead.

All those praying and waiting on God heard the noise like a mighty wind (though no hurricane took the roof off the upper room), and saw fire come down and divide into what looked like individual flames and rest on each person present.  And all were filled with the Holy Spirit.

The fire of God's presence - the purifying, awe-some, powerful force of God Himself, was now not devouring the 'new and living sacrifices', but filling them - and by extension all who call on His name - with His very presence and character.

As we cried out to God on behalf of the bereaved family from the near-by apartment building, and as we sought His favour and comfort for the man and woman who were injured by the fire, we also as a church sought God's altogether difference fire to fall on us afresh.  The power of fire and the destruction a stark reminder of why God chose fire as a way of revealing Himself to us.  But also the new way of living that we now have knowing that a different kind of fire has come upon His new body, us who call on the name of Jesus and are brought into the new family of the Church.

--------------------------------

photos courtesy of Jolly, Suma and Reneta Thomas

Under construction

We got a fabulous gift from the Vethanayagam family today.  5922 bricks.  And 3 books worth of instructions.  Enoch calculated the number by adding up the tally of each kind of brick as noted in the third book.

We spread them out on the floor into different heaps of colours like so:

Our fingers are sore from pulling apart the pieces.

But now the fun begins.  Putting each one of the 5922 pieces into place.  Note that the largest number of the pieces are white.

And what pray, may this all be?

What will rise in the Eicher household?

Well, nothing less than a Lego replica of the great monument to love that we have in Agra....

Let the building begin!

Painting a "Wall of Life"

We live in a pretty ugly city.  And so any bit of beauty is always a joy - especially when created by loving hands.

Welcome to the 'Wall of Life' which has come up over the past month on the wall of the Lok Hospital building outside the Jeevan Sahara Kendra!

Till last month - the wall next to the footpath outside the hospital was the normal city wall - some faded colour on it - and the standard grafitti from a political party calling people to attend a meeting.

Thanks to our dear friends Ilaisa and Shubhra, we have been able to literally paint a very different picture.

Ilaisa hails from the S. Pacific island country of Tonga - and came to India with a desire to serve God - and met his wonderful wife Shubhra here. 

Ilaisa is an artist - and when this couple approached us saying that they felt God asking them to volunteer with us we immediately thought of tapping into their artistic sides.

So the 'Wall of Life' came to be.

Ilaisa and Shubhra came up with the basic idea of mural of a train running the length of this 4 ft by 67 ft wall.  Pulled by a cheery engine, each 'wagon' would have a life-affirming message on it.  Our staff chipped in with suggestions and Ilaisa and Shubhra came up with the design.

Who would do the actual painting?  We had just the people.   Over the past half year, our JSK staff have been working with young people, helping them understand the changes taking place in them and the value of making good choices in life through a 15 session adolescent club experience.   We originally targetted the 'graduation' for these clubs on the 19th as our 'painting day' - but then decided to do it on the 27th of February which was also a public holiday.


What a thrill to see the young people at it!

After we got the wall painted and ready for the new art, Ilaisa spent a number of days sketching out the basic designs and getting the lettering ready.   The couple then sourced the paints and brushes for the big day - and so we had 33 brushes ready for the 22 eager painters who joined us to make this artwork.

It was magical to see the joy on the faces as the young guns got going.  Concentration was writ large on their faces as they worked to get the paint on the wall.  Each one focussed on their colour and their bit of work - and then as soon as it was over - running over to be given a new task.

Over the course of the day, we had a number of requests by others to join in too - but could not add too many kids as we had limited numbers of brushes - and a terrific task of mixing paints and getting everyone involved - all at the same time.

Needless to say, the young people loved it.  We had to literally pry them away from the painting at lunch time.  And before we knew it, there were already kids back out at the wall, painting away.




We live in a place where there are so few real opportunities for young people to do something positive.

It was important that each young one was given an opportunity to paint.  Shubhra and Ilaisa coached them well - telling them not to worry if some paint ran down - we would always be able to touch up later.

Part of the joy that the kids had was that what they were doing will be seen by many - and that they played a part to make something beautiful - and meaningful too!


Take the panel above, for instance.  So many kids are still aborted when their HIV positive mothers find out that they are pregnant. The default message by many medical practitioners both in private and govt. service is: "If HIV positive and pregnant, then you should terminate the pregnancy."  This despite the good news that with the correct treatment, it is very possible to give birth to an HIV negative child.  Over the past decade we have helped over 20 women who have HIV during their pregnancies and child-birth - and by God's grace not a single child has been born with the HIV infection to these dear women.

There is hope - but the message still needs to get out!


The "Wall of Life" is one way of seeing people access help at the right time.   We have our phone number featured prominently - so that people can call for HIV testing and advice.  

At the end of the day, we are dealing with a disease which still bears the sting of stigma, even though almost 3 decades have passed since the first cases were reported in India.  We have made huge strides in the treatment of HIV and care for people living with the disease - but they cannot be helped if they do not come for care!

How much longer will it take for people with HIV to be loved and accepted?

The "Wall of Life" is a small step in that direction.  We are so proud of our young people for making this beautiful mural - and trust that the messages of hope that it shares in such a colourful manner will go far towards making a real difference.

Do come by and take a look yourself one of these days!

The Chess Player

A young man we will call Mani was admitted at our JSK Center Last month.  19 years old.  19 long years of HIV.  Infected at birth.  During his short life till then he had seen his parents die of HIV.  And his sister.

Mani was the last in his family.  All he had left was his grandfather.

Our colleagues from MSF asked us to admit him.  We did.  Sheba and our nurses worked hard.

Mani had Multi-drug Resistant Tuberculosis.  He was being treated by MSF but stopped taking his medications.  Then he got very sick.

We admitted him and started him on his medications again.  Mani was very sick - requiring oxygen and numerous medical interventions.  Sheba and the did ICU level work with Mani.  Sodium levels down?  Stabilise.  Potassium out of whack?  Put under control.   All the while trying as best as possible to love anc care for this young man.

Mani did not eat much.  His body was wasted.  Thin.  He said he would die soon.   His grandfather sat with him in the room - wearing a mask to try and keep Mani's MDR TB from infecting him too.

One evening a volunteer couple sat and talked with Mani.  "What would you like to eat?"

"I won't," said Mani, "unless you get me a game to play."

"So what game would you like to play?"

"Chess."

A board was brought from a near-by home.

And from then on Mani and his grandfather were at it.  Almost every waking hour had them playing chess.




We worked hard with Mani.  Trying to get at the core of who he is.  But most of our efforts were rebuffed.  Mani had had hard knocks.  His coping mechanism was to be a rock, an island.  A place where no-one could touch him.  He was clearly afraid of death - but did not want to talk about it.

After a week, Mani did not improve as we hoped.  In consultation with our colleagues from MSF, Mani was shifted to another hospital for ICU care.

Last week we heard that Mani has died.

Our chess player is in eternity.

How much did his time with us help him?

We don't know.  There was very little to see on one hand.   Mani came sick.  He left sick.  He was cared for with a lot of love (and much courage for all who put themselves in the way of possible infection by him with MDRTB).  We did not see much response from Mani - he did not thank our nurses when he left.  But we could see the tears in his grand-father's eyes.

How do you measure impact into lives like Mani's?

Kudos to our staff who keep loving.  Prayers for our staff to keep on loving.  We wish we had met Mani earlier - at a different point in his life.  But in the end we are glad to have cared for him - even if it was for just a short time.  Even if it was just right at the end.

Trully, its better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.

"Perfect love casts out fear."